Worries…

So for those of you that don’t know me well I tend to worry about things a bit much.  This has never overly affected my life, except for I, as the boyfriend says, am surrounded by nervous energy.  Lately though the worrying has become more of a problem.  Almost 4 years ago I had a house built and moved into it with two of my fellow teachers.  In the process of paying for new home costs and old credit card costs I messed up my credit bad.  I am now in the process of fixing it, but I have no savings to speak of.  I have managed to make it work and I always found a way to handle whatever problem presented itself.

Three weeks ago I happened to really look close at a little used part of my basement and noticed some mold growing on the concrete walls.   I immediately freaked out, starting googling all the information I could find and thinking that now my house was ruined and I would never be able to sell it (something I hope to do in the next 5 years).  Finally I got that worry under control only to notice many vertical cracks in my walls.  Let the worry begin again…I was assured that this was normal and that as long as they are vertical they were okay.  Christmas eve, after 3 days of rain, I go downstairs to find that the cracks are leaking at the bottom.  I freak out again.

Now let me explain that when I say freak out I mean full-out anxiety attack, shortness of breath, tightness in the chest, loss of appetite and even sometimes a queasy stomach.  I discovered back in October, when I ran my first book fair, that my blood pressure rises when I am under stress and this causes many of the symptoms I have experienced as well.

Now I find myself thinking every little thing I see is a problem with my house.  I thought I had a dark mark on my tile in the kitchen and freaked out for about 30 minutes until my friend figured out it was a shadow from the kitchen chair.  My parents have both been to look at my house and have assured me that the problem is fixable, but I can’t stop obsessing over the it.  It doesn’t help that now I am looking for problems and have found proof that pretty much all the cracks are leaking.

I want to have the cracks filled and the basement waterproofed, but I know I can’t afford it and I can’t get a loan due to credit issues.

My mom and I have made a plan to clean out the basement this summer and to clean the floors, because just to top things off, my cat has been using the concrete floor to pee on for about the past year and the basement smells like cat pee.

I have no idea how much all of this will cost, but I do know that I can only scrape up about $4,000 by this summer.  Meanwhile I hate to be at my house, because every time I look at the basement or see a shadow I start to have trouble breathing.

Anyone have any ideas on how to help these problems for not a lot of money?

If you drink beer…

So let me start off by saying I don’t drink beer.  That being said, over the past year I have become very educated about beer and its wide variety of brewers and flavors.  Why, you ask, would a non beer drinker suddenly become so interested in the beverage?  Well, back in February I started dating my wonderful boyfriend, Joey.  Turns out he likes beer.  Now, I realize that this is not uncommon among red blooded American men, but it turns out that Joey had taken his enjoyment of beer to the next level.  He had a website where he and a couple friends reviewed different beers once a week.  He was in contact with many craft brewers across the country and they were sending him free samples of their beer to review on this website.  Turns out Joey knows his stuff and is quite good at giving his opinion of a beer in terms the average person can understand.  He is also really good at figuring out what a person likes and then finding new beer for them to try.  He has done this with my dad.  After a few conversations with him about what he liked Joey started bringing different types of beer with him whenever we visited for my dad to try.  At Christmas I overheard my dad commenting on how Joey has now gotten him into drinking all these different types of beer that he would have never tried before.  I have seen this type of thing happen over and over.  I have seen it happen with strangers in the grocery store (one guy didn’t know what he was getting into when he happened to ask Joey what he recommended).

Unfortunately the beer reviews for the website are on a indefinite hiatus, they haven’t filmed an episode since September.  Having been witness to how much Joey likes to share his love of the craft beers (sorry Joey if that isn’t the correct term) I have been playing with an idea for awhile.  I thought, wouldn’t it be great if Joey started a blog about the beer that he drinks.  The thing is Joey is a great writer as well as a great talker, this was something that I knew he would do well.  I finally broached the subject yesterday.  I told him about wordpress and how it was free.  He seemed on board with the idea and sat down to create his blog.  Turns out he did have a lot to say.  His first review is of Rogue’s Yellow Snow IPA.  I read it, and even though I can’t stand beer, I think it’s pretty good.  I, of course, got all excited and started talking about how all the different beer magazines could find it and he could then become a professional blogger.  He is just looking at this as another way to share his opinion…so far.

The point of this post is…if you drink beer you should check out his site, Drink Outside the Box, you never know what new brews you may discover.

November

So, the three of you who read this know that I only update every couple of months.  Last year I did a November review and I figured why not stick with tradition?

November is a busy month for me.  I have my birthday, a couple friend and family birthdays and anniversaries and Thanksgiving.  The month flew by this year.  I cannot believe that it will be December in 2 days.  December is shaping up to be busy as well, so we’ll see how many posts I do.

This year for my bday the boyfriend took me to one of our favorite nearby restaurants.  We both invited some friends and about 12 people showed up.  I followed bday tradition and got a bit tipsy, but a good time was had by all.  Here are some photos.

Thanksgiving was fun and hectic.  We went to my side of the family for a couple of hours and then shot down the road for his family’s.  We got done around 8 and I was asleep by 8:30, no joke, and slept until 9:30 the next day.  The turkey got the better of me.  I did not go shopping early, I could have, but chose not to join in the craziness.  I did however venture out later and had a wonderful thing called a brownie shake.  The cafe actually put an entire huge brownie in this thing.  I decided that this will now be a Thanksgiving treat for me since I don’t think I should have more than one a year.

So ends  November.  It was fun while it lasted.  I am almost done with Christmas shopping and I am going to have to hold off on most of the other buying until the 12/23 paycheck, but the tree is up and presents are wrapped underneath so I feel as if I am off to a good start.

Too much of a good thing?

Yesterday Joey and I attended a chili cook off at Danica and Richy’s.  We had a lot of fun.  Danica and Richy had custom mugs made for everyone who entered.  There were 8 different pots of chili and all were pretty good.  We spent a little over an hour just going around filling our bowls and then voting on the one we liked best.  Joey and I didn’t win, but we did get some votes.  I personally think that ours was one of the best. We then sat around talking with Elizabeth, Matt and Richy.  It was also great to participate in a “couples” thing with Joey.  It’s nice to have someone to do these things with.  We pooped out pretty early, I think due to eating so much hearty food so quickly.  I’m not sure my stomach is going to be incredibly pleased with me, but I’m sure it was worth it.  I am posting pics of our mugs and click here for our chili recipe.

Commemorative Chili Mugs

Also yesterday morning I met up with some friends for breakfast.  Julie was in town for her sister’s wedding, so it was nice getting to talk to her.  We stayed at the restaurant talking for about an hour and a half and then went out to the parking lot where I tried to take a picture of us by setting the timer on my camera and putting it on top of the car.  The pictures of our first five attempts show how well this did not work, but the 6th picture was acceptable to us all.  Plus, it was great just hanging out with the girls like we did in high school.

Oops didn't set the timer correctly

Timer, check...Zooming in so we can see who's in the picture, Nope

Oops, zoomed in too far

Well, got the zoom right, but forgot to center ourselves

Everything is great, except our eyes aren't open.

Finally, one we can all accept.

Helping out our military families

I was visiting my friend Lisa’s blog the other day and she had a post to a site that where you can help support military families overseas.  Many of the families shop at the base commissaries where prices are overpriced, yet these same families don’t have access to grocery coupons to help them save a bit.  The program Coupons for Troops allows you to send grocery coupons to families overseas.  The commissaries will even take coupons that are up to 6 months expired.  Since Lisa has turned me into an avid coupon clipper I find that I have many coupons that I throw away because they have expired, not to mention the coupons I don’t even clip because they are products I don’t use.  I can now register on this site and put my expired and unused coupons to good use.  This just proves that it’s possible to do good even when you can’t spend a lot of money.

For my friends who are mommas and papas

The boyfriend and I were discussing one of my favorite bands The Barenaked Ladies when he asked me if I had heard the song When You Dream.  I had not, so I immediately went on youtube to find it.  It is very sweet and I think any parent would love it.  The only youtube video I could find was the one below, and I am also posting the lyrics…enjoy.

With life just begun, my sleeping new son
Has eyes that roll back in his head
They flutter and dart, he slows down his heart
And pictures a world past his bed
Its hard to believe
As I watch you breathe
Your mind drifts and weaves

When you dream,
What do you dream about?
When you dream,
What do you dream about?
Do you dream about
Music or mathematics
Or planets too far for the eye?
Do you dream about
Jesus or quantum mechanics
Or angels who sing lullabies?

His fontanelle pulses with lives that hes lived
With memories hell learn to ignore
And when it is closed, he already knows
Hes forgotten all he knew before
But when sleep sets in
History begins
But the future will win

When you dream,
What do you dream about?
When you dream,
What do you dream about?
Are they colour or black and white,
Yiddish or english
Or languages not yet conceived?
Are they silent or boisterous?
Do you hear noises just
Loud enough to be perceived?
Do you hear del shannon’s runaway playing
On transistor radio waves?
With so little experience,
Your mind not yet cognizant
Are you wise beyond your few days?
When you dream,
What do you dream about?
When you dream,
What do you dream about?

Hurry up and wait…

I knew going in that this new job was going to be a challenge as I have no experience as a librarian.  I started back at work unofficially on Monday.  I am required to work 10 additional contract days and most people do 5 days before and 5 after.  I went in Monday not knowing what exactly I needed to do.  I did my lesson plans, because that is something I am used to and I have never worried about the things I am going to teach in the library.  I sent a couple emails to the tech guy and the former librarian (who is now librarian at the high school) and told them that I was at school and ready to do what needed to be done.  I had been told by our tech guy that I needed to inventory the entire library.  I was ready, I just needed to make sure I understood the software correctly.  I sat at school for 7 hours that day doing lesson plans and researching different aspects of librarianship. I never heard back from tech guy.  At 2:00 the bf called to see how things were going and I am embarrassed to say I kind of had a meltdown over the phone.  I was crying a little and telling him that I didn’t know what I was doing.  He kindly asked if I had asked someone for help.  To which I wailed “There is NO ONE here who can help me and the people who can’t help me won’t talk to me!”  A bit dramatic, I realize, but I was at the end of my rope and I didn’t know how I was going to survive.  The bf was great, he decided that we shouldn’t go to the ballgame we had tickets for, but stay in, watch some tv and have a few drinks.  I was all for that.  We went to the grocery store,  got some hot dogs (because I was already missing the game, I didn’t want to miss the hot dogs too) and then went to the liqueur store.  Now, I need to point out that I don’t drink that often, or that much, but that night I really just wanted to forget that Monday had ever happened and pretend that I was still a 4th grade teacher who knew exactly what she was doing.  I had my hot dogs, I had multiple glasses of my UV blue raspberry vodka with lemonade and I passed out around 10pm.  I didn’t feel great in the morning, but I felt good enough to admit to my new principal that I was clueless.  She was totally okay with it and admitted that she to was feeling overwhelmed by her new job (I have worked with her in the past when she was a teacher and then asst. principal).  She told me it was completely okay for me to go home and wait until the next day when my district “buddy”  (the former librarian) came in to show me what needed to be done.

Wednesday was better.  I learned how to work the cataloging software and spent the entire day productive.  My “buddy” told me not to worry about inventory at that point.  I went in Thursday knowing that I would be ready for the beginning of school…

At 3pm on Thursday the tech guy came in and told me that I HAD to do and inventory.  I fought him, I could do it at the end of the year like many other librarians, including the ones in our district.  No, this was not an option.  MY library hadn’t been fully inventoried in the 7 years he had been there.  Then he went on to point out that the 900 section of the nonfiction was currently located in between the fiction section and the biographies.  (This is in no way correct)  Now, I decided that if I was going to be teaching these kids how to find things in the library I should probably make sure it is set up correctly.

Since 3pm Thursday I have scanned and moved 3100 books with the help of a former student.  I have more than twice that to do.  The 900 section is currently occupying 6 tables in the library.  I have some serious allergy issues going on because of all the dust on the books.  I have decided to take today off and enjoy my last Saturday before school resumes.  The bf offered to come in and help me scan books today, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.  I will be going in tomorrow (Sunday) to work for many hours, taking a break only to attend a baby shower.  I hope to work a good 8-10 hours tomorrow.  The BF is going to come up on Monday, after my meetings, and help me scan.  I have all day Tuesday to work.  Open house is Tuesday at 5:30.  My goal is to have the 900 section put away by then.

Wish me luck and cross your fingers.  I can’t cross my own because they currently look like claws from holding the stupid book scanner.

Vacations and tests

So I’ve been out of touch for the past 2 weeks.  Busy, busy, busy I have been.  I left at 5 am on Wednesday the 15th for a long drive to upstate NY.  I was riding with my friend Rachel, her 6 year old son, 3 year old daughter and 1 1/2 year old dog.  The drive ended up taking 16.5 hours.  That’s right we did it all in one trip.  It wasn’t too bad, but I was walking like an old woman by the end of the trip.  Some pics of the drive are below with a small sampling of my other vaca pics.

I had fun visiting with Marnin and Rachel the week I was in NY.  Marnin and I drove into the Adirondacks twice.  The 3 of us went to the Ikea store in New Haven, CT for their big clearance sale and on Tuesday we got to go the the parade to kick off the county fair.  The fair was fun.  The vendors sold seafood which was a new treat for a midwestern girl used to only seeing pork and beef at the fairs.  I had a gator burger which was delicious.

Just waking up

So when I got back from NY I only had a day and a half in town before I had to drive across state to take my Praxis for the librarian job.  I had spent some time studying on my trip, but I was still about worried.  My mom and I drove up on Friday night and by the time we got there I had a horrible headache.  I sometimes get these migraines when my allergies (sinuses) act up.  I took some medicine and figured I would be okay in the morning.  When I woke up my headache was gone, but I was still feeling a little off.  Well, lucky me, while eating breakfast I had to run to the bathroom to throw up.  This was not the best way to go into the test.  Needless to say I spent the first hour of the test time (luckily the instruction time) concentrating on not getting sick during the test.  I managed to make it throught the test, although I am not sure how well I did.  My stomach has not been my friend since then.  I went into my classroom today to work and ended up leaving after only 5 hours.  I am pretty sure I have what everyone in NY had.  Did I mention that while visiting with them everyone in Rachel’s family got a stomach bug, all on different days?  Also, when I was on my second flight home there was a little girl behing me who was sick.  She was making good use of the “sick sacks” before the plane even began moving.  I am hoping that this is gone by tomorrow, because I have to have everything out of my old classroom by Friday.

July 3rd BBQ pics

as promised, pictures from my friends’ bbq

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Why is it that whenever you try to better yourself it cost money? Let me explain…I am finishing my master’s degree in educational technology, to do this I needed to pay about $100 to take the GRE just to be able to apply. I also had to pay a $45 application fee just so they would consider my application into the program. Then, of course, the classes are costing me about $1000 a pop. I got a new job as the school librarian which I am thrilled about. In order to have this job I must take another test which costs $85. Now, I am looking for study guides for this test because I hear it is hard and I don’t know much about the tiny details of running a school library. I go online and find a few books and flashcard sets, but they are going to cost me around $40 each. I finally find a downloadable ebook for $25. It is 76 pages long, so if I want to print it out to take on my vacation next week, it looks like I will have to buy more ink. My only hope is that I can download it to a flash drive and then take it with me to read on my friend’s computer.