Worries…

So for those of you that don’t know me well I tend to worry about things a bit much.  This has never overly affected my life, except for I, as the boyfriend says, am surrounded by nervous energy.  Lately though the worrying has become more of a problem.  Almost 4 years ago I had a house built and moved into it with two of my fellow teachers.  In the process of paying for new home costs and old credit card costs I messed up my credit bad.  I am now in the process of fixing it, but I have no savings to speak of.  I have managed to make it work and I always found a way to handle whatever problem presented itself.

Three weeks ago I happened to really look close at a little used part of my basement and noticed some mold growing on the concrete walls.   I immediately freaked out, starting googling all the information I could find and thinking that now my house was ruined and I would never be able to sell it (something I hope to do in the next 5 years).  Finally I got that worry under control only to notice many vertical cracks in my walls.  Let the worry begin again…I was assured that this was normal and that as long as they are vertical they were okay.  Christmas eve, after 3 days of rain, I go downstairs to find that the cracks are leaking at the bottom.  I freak out again.

Now let me explain that when I say freak out I mean full-out anxiety attack, shortness of breath, tightness in the chest, loss of appetite and even sometimes a queasy stomach.  I discovered back in October, when I ran my first book fair, that my blood pressure rises when I am under stress and this causes many of the symptoms I have experienced as well.

Now I find myself thinking every little thing I see is a problem with my house.  I thought I had a dark mark on my tile in the kitchen and freaked out for about 30 minutes until my friend figured out it was a shadow from the kitchen chair.  My parents have both been to look at my house and have assured me that the problem is fixable, but I can’t stop obsessing over the it.  It doesn’t help that now I am looking for problems and have found proof that pretty much all the cracks are leaking.

I want to have the cracks filled and the basement waterproofed, but I know I can’t afford it and I can’t get a loan due to credit issues.

My mom and I have made a plan to clean out the basement this summer and to clean the floors, because just to top things off, my cat has been using the concrete floor to pee on for about the past year and the basement smells like cat pee.

I have no idea how much all of this will cost, but I do know that I can only scrape up about $4,000 by this summer.  Meanwhile I hate to be at my house, because every time I look at the basement or see a shadow I start to have trouble breathing.

Anyone have any ideas on how to help these problems for not a lot of money?

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3 responses to this post.

  1. Oh no! Good luck!
    btw, I was surprised to read that you’re a worrier. You really don’t come across as a worrier to me.

    Reply

  2. Posted by Lynn on January 24, 2010 at 8:23 pm

    I don’t know how to fix your house, but can give you lots of sympathy! So sorry KT, but if I know you, you’ll hatch a great plan to take care of it. Cracks are normal, we have a few too. You might check your local Home Depot and see if they have any advice or classes on this sort of thing. We have a couple of friends who finished their basement themselves, and learned it all from those classes. Good Luck, I’ll be thinking of you!

    Reply

  3. Posted by Lisa on January 25, 2010 at 10:33 am

    I understand how you feel completely! I have anxiety and depression issues and have been on medication for 4 years now. I just want you to know you aren’t alone in your feelings. I will ask around and see if I can’t dig up some info about your basement. ((HUGS))

    Reply

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